nheiges 1/20/2017
4
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#totwinvention

Machine Translation from The Urban Dictionary

a 2 foot tall camera is on a lectern. the lectern is on a [metal] floor. a very large metal mouth is -1 inch in front of and -1.3 foot above the camera. a huge metal ear is -1 inches to the left of and -1.2 feet above the camera. a blue wall is -.1 inch behind the floor. a 3 foot wide and .5 foot tall control panel is -.5 foot above the camera. a 1st 5 foot tall and 3 foot wide flat white cone is -1 foot to the left of and -1.5 foot above and .1 inch in front of the ear. it is leaning 120 degrees to the left. a 2nd 5 foot tall and 3 foot wide flat white cone is -2 inches to the right of and -1.7 foot above the mouth. it is leaning 90 degrees to the right. A very tiny black "you just got read for filth" is in front of and -3.35 foot above the 1st cone. it is leaning 30 degrees to the left.
A very tiny black "you were harshly criticized" is in front of and -1.6 feet above the 2nd cone.

the not quite got it right time machine

a 10 feet tall first gold clock.the first clock is face up.a couch is above the clock.a man is -25 inches above the couch.the man is face up.the man is facing right.a skeleton is -22 inches above the man.the skeleton is face up.the skeleton is facing right.the first clock is 10 feet above the ground.the skeleton is -26 inches behind the man.a second 6 feet tall clock is behind the couch.a third clock is left of the couch.the third clock is facing the couch.a fourth 2 feet tall clock is in front of the couch.a fifth 2 feet tall clock is left of the fourth clock.a sixth 2 feet tall clock is right of the fourth clock.a 3 feet tall hourglass is -3 inches right of the couch.silver ground.the ground is 300 feet tall.the sky is [abstract].a yellow light is 6 inches above the man.

Inaugural SpeechTeleprompter Auto Correcter

a large television. the screen of the television is blue.a 4 inch tall "IN BED WITH RUSSIA" is -4.1 feet above and 0.08 feet to the front of the television. a 4 inch tall "WHEN WE GET" is 2 inches above the "IN BED WITH RUSSIA". a 4 inch tall "BE FANTASTIC" is 2 inches above the "WHEN WE GET". the 4 inch tall "AMERICA WILL" is 2 inches above the "BE FANTASTIC". the 4 inch tall "FABULOUS,TRUE, SO TRUE" is 2 inches above the "AMERICA WILL". the 4 inch tall "THE BEST EVER" is 2 inches above the "FABULOUS,TRUE, SO TRUE". the 4 inch tall "OUR RATINGS WILL BE" is 2 inches above the "THE BEST EVER". a huge eraser is 0.1 feet in front of and -1 feet above and -1.6 feet to the right of the television. it faces right. it leans 87 degrees to the northwest. a white 3 inch wide and 5 feet tall flat tube is 0.12 feet in front of and -4.25 feet above and -5.47 feet left of the television. it leans 43 degrees to the left. the ground is clear. the sky is [night].

The Amazing Voice Activated Clap On Clap Off Lava Lamp

large silver bell is upside down. it is -0.9 feet above and -1.6 feet to the left of the large table. a large silver bowl is -0.2 feet above the bell.it is upside down. 1st clear 1.6 feet wide cone is -0.6 feet above the bowl. it is upside down. 2nd 1.6 feet wide and 2 feet tall clear cone is on the 1st cone. a clear red bulb syringe is -2.8 feet above the 2nd cone. it is upside down. 1st 4 inch tall red talk bubble is 2 inches above and -4.5 inches left of the bulb syringe. it leans 43 degrees to the left. 2nd 3.5 inch tall clear red talk bubble is -3.2 inches right of and 1.5 inches above the 1st talk bubble. it leans 76 degrees to the right. a tiny marble is right of the bulb syringe. 3 red lights are -1 inch above the marble. a pale blue light is behind the bowl. a 15 feet tall tile wall is 5 feet behind the table. a 7.5 feet tall boy is behind and 0.4 feet right of the table. he faces the bowl. the shirt of the boy is [concert]. a 1 feet wide and 3 inch tall circle is -1.5 feet to the right of and on the table. 1st large tan hand is -0.6 feet to the right of the circle. it is upside down. 2nd large tan hand is -0.2 feet left of and -1 feet above the 1st hand. it faces northwest. it is upside down.the camera light is 65% purple. a gold light is 1 inch above the marble. a dim beige light is 0.2 feet right of and -0.2 feet above the 1st hand. the ground is tile. a dim orange light is 6 inches in front of and -1 feet above the table. a large mirror is -9 feet above and 0.1 feet in front of and -9.5 feet to the left of the wall. the 4 inch tall black "CLAP" is above and 1 inch behind and 1 inch right of the 1st hand. it leans 30 degrees to the right. a dim cream light is 1 inch in front of the "CLAP". the sky is [night]. the sun is 30% dim.

Ronco's Handy Dandy Electric Chicken Plucker

a large [metal] iron leans 90 degrees to the back. 1st 0.6 feet tall and 1 inch wide tube is -0.5 feet above and -0.1 feet to the front of the iron. it leans 90 degrees to the front. 2nd 0.6 feet tall and 1 inch wide tube is -1 feet above and -0.3 feet to the left of and -0.1 feet to the front of the iron. it leans 90 degrees to the front. 3rd 0.6 feet tall and 1 inch wide tube is -1 feet above and -0.3 feet to the right of and -0.1 feet to the front of the iron. it leans 90 degrees to the front. 1st small bird cage is in front of and -0.3 feet above the 1st tube. it leans 90 degrees to the front. 2nd small bird cage is -0.3 feet above and in front of the 2nd tube. it leans 90 degrees to the front. 3rd small bird cage is in front of and -0.3 feet above the 3rd tube. it leans 90 degrees to the front. a small chicken is -1 feet above and -0.5 feet to the front of the 1st bird cage. 1st white feather is 2 inches above the 1st bird cage. 2nd white feather is 2 inches left of and -1 feet above the 2nd bird cage. it leans 65 degrees to the right. 3rd white feather is 3 inches right of the 3rd bird cage. it leans 43 degrees to the left. 4th white feather is -15 inches above the chicken. it is upside down. 5th white feather is 1.5 feet in front of the iron. it faces left. it leans 70 degrees to the northwest. 6th white feather is above the 2nd bird cage. it faces left. it leans. right. a plug is -2 feet above and -1 inch to the back of the iron. it leans 90 degrees to the back.a outlet is -0.1 feet to the back of and -0.2 feet above and -0.43 feet to the right of the plug. a wood wall is behind and -3 feet to the right of the outlet. the ground is dirt. a 3.5 feet tall boy is 1 feet right of the 3rd bird cage. he is on the ground. he faces the chicken. the sun is 90% old gold. the camera light is dull.

Penguin Powered Polar Fish Wheel

a 20 feet tall [metal] ferris wheel is -8 feet above the ground. 1st penguin is -0.7 feet to the left of and -10 feet above the ferris wheel. it faces right. 2nd penguin is -1.9 feet to the left of and -6 feet above the ferris wheel. it faces right. 3rd penguin is -2 feet above and -7 feet to the left of the ferris wheel. it faces right. a 13 feet tall ladder is in front of the ferris wheel. it is -2 feet above the ground. 4th penguin is -4.2 feet above the ladder. it faces northwest. 5th penguin is 1 feet in front of and 1.2 feet to the left of the ladder. it is -1.8 feet above the ground. it faces the right. it leans to the front. 1st salmon is 0.2 feet right of and -8 feet above the ferris wheel. it faces right. it leans back.a 7 feet tall boat is 3 feet right of the ferris wheel.it is on the ground. a 6th 6 feet tall penguin is -8 feet to the left of and -12 feet to the front of the boat. it faces the southwest. 2nd salmon is -0.1 feet right of and -5 feet above the ferris wheel. it faces right. it leans 25 degrees to the front. 3rd salmon is -1 feet left of and -2.5 feet above and 1 feet in front of the 6th penguin.it faces southeast. it leans to the front. the camera light is old gold. the sky is water. a orange light is 2 inches in front of the 3rd salmon. 2 dim yellow lights are -1 feet to the front of and -5 feet above and -5 feet to the right of the ferris wheel. 2 dim pink lights are -1 feet to the front of and -5 feet above and -5 feet to the left of the ferris wheel

watcher570 1/19/2017
5
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#totwInvention

bespoke electric generator

a shiny copper structure.the structure is 100 feet deep.the structure is 50 feet wide.the structure is 40 feet tall.a 30 feet tall first shiny part is right of the structure.a 10 feet tall second shiny part is -75 inches above the structure.a 30 feet tall shiny magnet is 8 inches in front of the first part.the magnet is facing the first part.a first shiny 40 feet tall lightning bolt is behind the second part.the first lightning bolt is leaning 45 degrees to the north.a 65 feet tall man is left of the structure.the man is facing the structure.the ground is shiny.the sky is texture.the texture is 1500 feet tall.a 100 feet tall silver wall is 1 feet behind the structure.the wall is 200 feet long.

The Big One

a fire. it is .7 feet in the ground. the ground is grass. an ape is next to the fire. it is on the ground. it is facing east. a small ape is 1 foot east of the fire. it is on the ground. it is facing west. a orangutan is 2 feet north of the fire. it is on the ground. it is facing south.a gorilla is 12 feet north of the orangutan. it is 2 feet east of the orangutan. it is night. the sun is black. the camera light is dark blue. a red light is .5 inches above the fire. an orange light is on the fire. a small yellow light is just south of the fire. it is 1 inch off the ground. the ambient light is black.

Steam-Powered Sewing Train - still working out the kinks

a 20 foot tall [metal] machine is on a 10 foot wide [metal] skateboard. the machine's body is [metal]. the skateboard is on a 150 foot deep railroad track. a 4 foot tall shiny white poop is facing left. it is upside down. it is -.1 inch above and -12 feet to the right of and -11 feet in front of the machine. a 1st 11 foot tall squirrel is -1 foot above and -8 feet behind the skateboard. it is leaning 5 degrees to the front. a 6 foot tall armadillo is -15 feet above and -4 feet in front of the machine. a 5 foot tall silver sphere is -5 foot in front of and 0 inches above the skateboard. it is night. a yellow light is 3 feet above the machine. a very huge shiny gold rope is -1 inch behind the sphere. it is leaning 45 degrees to the front. it is facing southeast. 2 gold lights are 1 foot above the rope. the ground is reddish brown.

watcher570 1/18/2017
2
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#totwInvention

The get you to work on time chair !

a 5 feet tall chair.a man is -33 inches above the chair.a first 2.4 feet tall spring is -14 inches right of the man.the first spring is on the ground.the first spring is -14 inches behind the man.a second 2.4 feet tall spring is -14 inches left of the man.the second spring is on the ground.the second spring is -14 inches behind the man.a third 2.4 feet tall spring is -12 inches in front of the man.the third spring is on the ground.the third spring is -46 inches left of the man.a 1.5 feet tall yellow hat is -8 inches above the man.the hat is -43 inches in front of the man.a 2.5 feet tall first wheel is right of the chair.a second 2.5 feet tall wheel is left of the chair.a green truck is 6 feet left of the chair.the ground is shiny road.a first structure is 10 feet left of the truck.the first structure is 1 feet in front of the truck.a second structure is 3 feet behind the first structure.the second structure is facing left.

lespaulguy 1/17/2017
3
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#totwinvention

The Alchemist

The "in" is 6 feet above the ground. The large "au" is to the right of the "in". It is 5.4 feet above the ground. The "guration" is to the right of the "au". It is 6 feet above the ground. The man is to the right of the "in". He is on the ground. The ground is gold. The "au" is gold. The large head is in front and -3 feet above the man. The gold White House is 200 feet behind the man.

Amphibious Beach Vehicle

A large duck is -8 inches above the ground. A [flower] car is -3 feet above a huge beach ball. It is leaning 5 degrees to the back. The duck is 4 feet right of the ball. The ground is 50 feet wide water. The ball is -4 feet above the ground. A large duck is in front of and left of the duck. It is facing southeast. A ship is 50 feet behind and 150 feet left of the ball. Camera light is black. 2 dim yellow lights are in front of and -5 feet above and -2 feet left of the car. 3 dim lemon lights are in front of and -5 feet above and -1 foot right of the car. The sun is peach. A light is right of the car. A red light is left of the car.

Interplanetary Elevator

a 5 foot tall and 2 foot wide and 10 foot deep [Space] machine. it is leaning back. a light is -2 feet above the machine. a 3 foot tall person is -4 foot behind and -5 feet above the machine. the person is facing back. he is leaning back.

Laser Lobotomy

a machine. a 2 foot tall man is -2.3 feet to the right of and -3.2 feet above the machine. he is facing right. he is leaning 90 degrees to the back. a yellow light is -2 foot above and -2 feet to the right of the machine. a glass wall is behind the machine. a 4.5 foot tall woman is 2 feet behind the man. the woman is 0 inches above the ground. a white wall is behind the woman. a small shiny [Hospital] wall is 4 feet in front of the man.
a 1st shiny [metal] funnel is .2 inches over and -1 inches to the left of and -8 inches in front of the man. it is 2 foot tall and 3 inches wide and 3 inches deep. a green light is -1 inch below the funnel.
the sky is shiny white.
the sun is dim lavender.

Body Snatcher (R)

the first man is 7 inches in the bed. he is face up. the ground is tile. the shiny tile wall is 3 feet behind the bed. the cactus is 1 foot to the right of the bed. it is face up. it is 3 feet wide and 5 feet tall. a second man is 2 foot in the cactus. he is face up. the very huge lightning is 5 feet in the first man. it is leaning 90 degrees to the left. the large alien is to the right and 1.5 foot in front of the cactus. he is facing the cactus.

The first solar powered train !

a barrel.the barrel is face up.a funnel is -10 inches in front of the barrel.the funnel is -3 inches above the barrel.a humongous drop is -3 inches above the funnel.the drop is upside down.a first wheel is right of the barrel.the barrel is 2 inches above the ground.the first wheel is on the ground.a second wheel is left of the barrel.the second wheel is on the ground.a pinwheel is -8 inches behind the barrel.the pinwheel is -4 inches above the barrel.a symbol is in front of the barrel.the symbol is 5 inches above the ground.a super red sun symbol is -15 inches behind the barrel.the sun symbol is 2 inches in the ground.the ground is 250 feet tall.the ground is picture.a red light is above the drop.the funnel is black.the sun is pink.

nheiges 1/17/2017
6
4
#totwinvention

Wake-Up Call

a huge balloon is 0 feet above a huge anvil. the anvil is 5 feet above and 1.5 feet to the left of a 2 feet tall tube. the tube is leaning 90 degrees to the back. the tube is on the ground. a 1 inch tall and 3 feet deep and 5 feet wide black cube is -1 inches above the tube. it is leaning 6 degrees to the left. a large cat is -7 inch above and -2 feet to the right of the cube. it is facing right. it is leaning to the back. a 4 feet tall bed is 6 feet to the right of the cube. a big boy is .5 feet in the bed. he is leaning 90 degrees to the back. a 1st 20 feet tall and 20 feet wide white [window] wall is behind the bed. a 2nd 20 feet tall and 50 foot wide gray wall is 0 inches to the left of the 1st wall. a 10 foot deep and 1 inch tall arrow is 3 feet to the left of the balloon. it is facing right. it is 10 feet above the ground. it is leaning 30 degrees to the back. the ground is tile. it is noon. a 10 foot tall man is to the left of the arrow. he is 0 inches above the ground. the ambient light is ink blue. the camera light is orange.

watcher570 1/17/2017
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#totwInvention

prototype electric magnetic therapy bath !

a gold bath.a wheel is 10 inches above the bath.a first rust chain is right of the wheel.the first chain is face up.a second rust chain is left of the wheel.the second chain is face up.the first chain is -45 inches above the wheel.the second chain is -15 inches above the wheel.a large baby pink hand is -5 inches above the second chain.a part is 1 inches right of the wheel.a 2 feet tall magnet is 20 inches behind the bath.the magnet is facing left.a head is -10 inches in front of the bath.the head is 1.5 feet above the ground.the ground is shiny tile.a mirror is 3 feet left of the bath.the mirror is facing the bath.the mirror is 12 feet wide.

boneybird 1/16/2017
4
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#totwinvention

Precision back-scratcher

The small golf cart is 2 inches in the man. The tiny first vehicle is -9 inches above and -2 inches behind the golf cart. It is facing back. It is leaning 20 degrees to the front. A second small vehicle is -12 inches behind and -3.3 feet above the first vehicle. The fishing pole is -3 feet behind and -5 feet above the second vehicle. It is leaning 45 degrees to the front. The wheel is -2 feet above and -2 feet to the right of the man. It is facing left. A second wheel is -3 feet above and -2 feet to the left of the man. It is facing left.

The Invention Of (A) Mother

a [metal] workbench. a 2 feet tall ice cube is -4 feet to the left of and -0.4 feet above the workbench. it leans 90 degrees to the right. a 5 feet tall man is -5.4 feet to the right of and -0.1 feet above the workbench. he faces right. he leans 90 degrees to the back. a 1.5 feet tall and 1.5 feet long white picture is 0.1 feet to the back of and -1.6 feet above the ice cube. it faces back. a 1.1 feet tall flat talk bubble is 0.1 feet to the back of the picture. a cyan light is 0.06 feet behind the talk bubble. small pillow is -1.3 feet left of and on the workbench. it leans 45 degrees to the back. the ground is tile. a tile wall is 3 feet in front of the table. the sky is powder blue. a baby is -0.1 feet behind and -0.9 feet above the talk bubble. he faces right. he leans 60 degrees to the back. the camera light is dim. a white spotlight is -8 feet to the left of and -4 feet above and 0.3 feet behind the wall. it leans 60 degrees to the front. it faces back. a red light is -20 inches above and -2 inches behind the spotlight. the sun is invisible. a nurse is in front of and -2.7 feet to the right of the table. she faces northwest.

Twin Engine vs. Jet Engine

1st bicycle is 7 feet above the ground. 1st 3.8 feet tall umbrella is -1 feet above and -6.5 feet to the front of the bicycle. 1st harpy eagle is -1.25 feet above and -0.3 feet to the right of the umbrella. it leans left. 2nd harpy eagle is -1.25 feet above and -0.3 feet to the left of the umbrella.it leans right. 1st cartoon is -1.7 feet above and -3.7 feet to the front of the bicycle. 2nd cartoon is -0.7 feet behind the 1st cartoon. it leans 5 degrees to the back. 2nd bicycle is -3 feet in front of and 5 feet to the left of the 1st bicycle.it faces back. it leans back. a king vulture is -3 feet to the back of and -0.6 feet above the 2nd bicycle. it faces back. 3rd cartoon is -1.6 feet above and -2.66 feet to the front of the 2nd bicycle. it faces back. it leans 7 degrees to the back. 2nd 3.8 feet tall umbrella is -2.3 feet in front of and -3 feet above the 3rd cartoon. it leans 7 degrees to the front. a small beech tree is 20 feet left of and 6 feet behind and -12 feet above the 1st bicycle. the ground is grass. a small boy is -6 feet right of and -4 feet to the front of the tree. he is on the ground. he faces southeast. it is noon. a orange light is 2 inches in front of the 1st harpy eagle.